The best day of my life
as far back as i can remember, friday night has been the place to be.
maybe not place...time? i guess.
but. friday. its always been THE day of the week. some like saturdays. i like friday. i dont know why. but, i always have such high hopes for the last day of the week/first day of the weekend.
its the relief of the work week being over. the anticipation of time to be as recreational as i can possibly be.
i used to (and, still do every now and then) get wicked depressed on friday nights when nothing was going on or when i had no escape from my room. not only is tv the worst on friday nights, but the air is filled with this tension...this need that somehting needs to be or get done. i think its because its so ingrained in my head that this one night is the only night i want to ever exist.
in middle school, friday night consisted of going to sheridan plaza to see a movie and loiter.
in the beginning of high school, friday night was riverfront. all the "cool" kids (druggies and wannabe/gonnabe druggies) would spend 2-5 hours walking back and forth along a half a mile stretch of the new river. indulging in the substances we could get our hands on: beer, cigarettes, occasionally weed.
later high school friday was hollywood beach tripping. roaming the broadwalk with the colors streaming, blurs of strangers turned friends' faces, and the desolate whispers the deserted beach late at night creates.
in college, friday night was getting shitfaced as soon after dinner as possible. back when getting shitfaced was still something new and a bit of a challenge to unaccustomed stomachs. wed search the campus for a willing 21+ year old or a courageous minor. then wed take shots and wander around the campus finding adventures.
when i moved back, friday was still the night-even being out of school. as soon as i got out of work from winn-dixie id arrange a ride to hollywood. the plan each time: to get as fucked up as possible on whatevers available. and we did. circulating throughout the tiny apartment dozens of times throughout the night.
after having analyzed all the phases of my friday nights past, i see. its all about freedom. i was free. to be out. to feel alive. to do something. not doing what i HAVE to do. not doing what i am SUPPOSED to do. time to breathe. i guess its no wonder i can get cabin fever nights when i cant find a way out. its because for the last 10 years ive been used to escaping that one night of the week. and fun times ensue. so, when i cant go-its depressing and i feel like im missing out on something.
i dont know. i just REALLY love fridays. why not saturday? i figured out the answer to that too. now, while saturday can also be a day of freedom...in my life, saturday has a habit (especially more in the last 2 or 3 years) of melding in with the rest of the weekend. its gets lost. i forget about it and it never existed. whereas, friday is the kickoff. its the beginning. i can remember friday-i can hardly ever remember saturday.
friday is the day to get high-as much so as possible. the rest of the weekend is trying to stay there and deal with going back down.
i dont know why i just went on a friday rant, but i meant every word. maybe it was because this friday was pretty uneventful. i think i went out? but, it didnt live up to my friday standards-and i have high friday standards. hmm..what did i do?
oh, yeh...i smoked with john and went home to watch reservoir dogs with my brother.
well, this coming friday (im already thinking to make sure itll be a good one) will hopefully be more happening.